Final Goodbyes
by teamjazzler
Summary: What would have happened if Bella had decided to stay human in Twilight? Not a HEA and comes with a tissue warning. One-shot.


_It's quite short but been playing on my mind for a few weeks now. Hope you all enjoy it._

_I think i should put a _**tissue warning **_here - I cried._

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There are things in life, that you greatly regret doing, looking back years later.

Staying human, for me, was not one of those things.

At the age of 17 when I first met Edward Cullen - the most infuriating boy I had ever met, who coincidentally was a vampire and my soulmate - I realised I had a decision to make.

I could be changed into a vampire and live with him for eternirty - never leaving his side.

This idea, however tempting it may be, would mean I would have to sacrifice a lot:

_My humanity, my family, my friends, my ability to live amongst human for at least a year and the ability to grow old._

I would be frozen as a 17 year old girl forever. Never changing. Never moving forward.

It was the most agonizing year of my life, as I decided to weigh out all of the pros and cons of becoming a vampire like Edward and his family.

Or staying human.

I agonized over my decision for a little over 11 months before reaching my decision - to stay human.

Some people may think that this was a stupid decision, but for me it wasn't.

No matter how much I loved Edward - I loved my family more.

I had to have them in my life, and I couldn't if I were a vampire.

I could kill them instantly if I was.

Edward and his family approved and supported my decision, even though I knew Alice was disappointed in not having forever to shop and play Bella Barbie with me.

Edward Cullen was my soulmate. I knew this without a doubt in my mind and heart. He was the most kind, caring, romantic and protective person I have ever met. He refused to let me open my own doors - especially car ones and always pulled out a chair for me.

The saying _'chivalry isn't dead'_ always came to mind when I thought of him.

I loved him and he loved me.

Our love was endless and bound so strong that we decided to get married, in a small private ceremony with friends and family, on my 21st birthday.

I had just graduated from studying Psychology in college and we were officially moving in together.

I had got job at a local hospital where Carlisle was also working and loved it.

I moved with the Cullens everytime they moved town. Which was around every 6 years.

They just couldn't run the risk of being discovered for what they were. NO human could ever know that vampires exist.

I wasn't even an exception.

They had basically broken the vampire law by revealing themselves to me but they couldn't care less.

I was Edward's _la tua cantante_. His singer, so they just turned a blind eye to the fact that they could be killed.

The pattern of moving continued every 6 years for the rest of my life.

Now, at the age of 81, we had just made _MY_ final move.

I wouldn't live long enough to see Edward become a doctor for the 18th time.

I wouldn't see Alice shop and dress me up again for the millionth time.

Or Carlisle and Esme help people by caring for them or renovating houses for them to live in.

I wouldn't see Emmett and Jasper wrestling again or have Emmett try to joke with me after I had been discussing the Civil War with Jasper again.

And I would never see Rose finally excepting and treating me like a sister again.

I was too weak for that.

It wasn't that I had a terminal disease or anything - just that my time had come and my immune system had started to shut down.

I could barely even go outside anymore.

I was sitting on the living room couch surrounded by my second family, wrapped up in Edward's arms, when I saw Alice being pulled into a vision.

I knew what was coming. I could feel it in my old, aching bones.

I felt Edward stiffen when I asked her, "It's time, isn't it?"

"I'm afraid so, Bella. It will happen in exactly 43 minutes." She started to dry sob at the end of her sentence.

Jasper wrapped her in his arms and I felt a wave of calm hit the room.

"It's okay, Alice. We all knew this was coming." I smiled sadly at her.

She stood up and ran over to where I was sitting on the couch and pulled me into a hug.

"I love you so much Bella. You are my best friend in the whole world. I will never, ever forget you. I promise." She cried into my neck.

I felt tears well up in my eyes as I said, "I love you too, Ali. So much. My very own little pixie."

She stepped back and Jasper pulled me into his cool embrace next.

"I may not show it well Bella, but I do love you. I'm going to miss you and our discussions." He smiled, his Southern accent surfacing.

"I will miss them as well, Jazz. I love you too."

Emmett was next but he looked hesitant.

"I won't bite Emmy-bear." I laughed softly.

He lifted me up off the couch and into his arms as he whispered, "I love you so much Bella-boo. Who will I make blush now? Who will laugh at my jokes? Just know I love you." He cried.

The tears in my eyes spilled over when I heard him say that and I hugged him tighter as I said, "I don't know, but you will. Somebody will get your jokes Em. I know you love me, I love you just as much. I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too." He placed a soft kiss on my head and then passed me to Rose.

She smiled sadly. "I'm going to make it short and sweet sis. I know I used to be a bitch but I love you, will miss you and promise to never forget you." She kissed me on the cheek when I wrapped my arms around her quickly.

Then the two I was dreading.

Carlisle and Esme.

Esme looked close to tears and Carlisle just looked sad.

They both ran over to me and gathered me into a hug.

Esme whispered, "You will always be my daughter. You brought our son back to life. We owe you so much for that, dear. I love you." She started dry sobbing like Alice when Carlisle said, "We will never, ever forget you Isabella Swan. You changed us all. We love and thanks you." He placed a tender kiss on my forehead as he pushed me into my beloved's waiting arms.

"Can we go to the meadow?" I asked him, noticing I only had 15 minutes left.

"Of course, love." He grinned crookedly, though I knew it was forced.

"Do you want us there Edward?" Alice asked quietly.

"Can you just wait for a few minutes after? I need..." He trailed off.

"We understand Edward. Take care." Esme kissed his forehead once and mine before watching us walk out the back door.

Looking back at my second family, I knew there was one thing I had to say before I left.

So I whispered, "Thank you." before Edward started running through the forest towards our meadow.

We were silent on the way there but once we got to the meadow and Edward sat down, pulling me into his lap, he started talking.

"I love you so much Bella. How will I ever live without you? How can I live in a world where you don't exist. I love you Bella. Please grasp how much. I love you more than you love chocolate. More than Romeo loved Juliet. More than Cathy loved Heathcliff!"

I laughed softly, remembering all the times he teased me about re-reading 'Wuthering Heights' over and over again.

"Bella, do you know how much I love you? Nothing compares Bella. Nothing. Bella, before you my life was like a endless night. Completely alone in the darkness. And then you shot across my sky like a meteorite and lit up my dark sky. What is going to happen when you disappear into the horizon? What am I going to do without you?" He sobbed, curling his arms around me protectively, even though we both knew the attempt was futile.

"I don't know Edward, I wish I did. I wish that I could take away all of the pain and heartache and guilt you are sure to feel, even though you shouldn't. I knew this was going to happen, I let it happen. I love you with every single millimeter of my heart Edward, but I just couldn't give up my family. I hope you understand that. You mean the world to me, but I just couldn't sacrifice them." I was crying again and Edward started to kiss the tears away.

"I understand Bella. God, I understand it so much. I would have done the same thing if it were me. I love you even more for it though. I promise to love you, every moment of forever. My la tua cantante."

I smiled softly and said, "And so the lion fell in love with the lamb."

"Forever." He promised.

"I love you so, so much Edward Anthony Masen Cullen."

"I love you even more Isabella Marie Swan Cullen." He laughed softly and kissed my hair before turning my head so his lips could touch mine.

I knew there was only a few minutes left.

"It's twilight." I murmured, already fading fast.

Edward noticed this and a pained expression showed on his face when he said, "Yes, it is." in a strained voice.

I reached up with my hand to touch his head cheek the last time and whispered, "I love you, Edward."

I heard him whisper, "I love you too, Bella." but it was too late.

I was already gone.

That night, I took one last look at Edward Cullen - my vampire husband who had stolen my heart and soul all those years ago - and I was thankful that God had let Edward come into my life.

My last moments on this Earth were happy and satisfying - memories to be cherished in the afterlife as I believed there was.

My last memories were me and Edward sitting in our meadow, at twilight, him holding me and whispering how much he loved me.

That beautiful twilight, I left this world forever.

That night, my heart stopped beating.

That night I, Isabella Marie Swan-Cullen, said my final goodbyes.

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**Did you cry? What did you think of it?**

**Review please? I'd like to know what you all thought of it.**


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